handjob tips. give me some.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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