awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
