I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
that is very illegal...i love you.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
