My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
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