I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
