They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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