reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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