Me too!
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
