another moral hangover. fuck.
She announced her abortion via fbk
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
