its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I know her cup size but not her name....
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