Im at strip club and am horny
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Randomize
