My friends, they love my intelligence
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Randomize
