This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
