WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
