the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Randomize
