Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize