No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Randomize
