well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
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