i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
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