ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I just cut my nipple shaving
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
