She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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