How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
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