My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
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