I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Randomize
