im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize
