I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
