She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
