my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Randomize