Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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