It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
