i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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