Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Randomize