TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
