That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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