he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Randomize
