You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Randomize
