ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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