Moan for me like Helen Keller
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
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