It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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