Just mADE A PArabola og urine
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
