genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
