Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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