Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
