so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Randomize
