It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Randomize