So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
