is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
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