I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
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