just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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