It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Randomize