Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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